Father Daughter Dance Tips

This is one of those moments you’ve been thinking about for years – maybe since the day she was born. The father-daughter dance at her wedding isn’t just a tradition. It’s a milestone. It’s a memory in the making. And if the thought of dancing in front of 150 guests makes you break out in a cold sweat, you’re not alone.

Here’s the good news: with the right approach, you can turn this moment from terrifying to triumphant.

1. Pick a song that has some history

• Was this a song you used to sing to her as a kid?
• Was this the song you danced to at her father-daughter dance in middle school?
• If all else fails, let her pick the song. After all, you’re a cool Dad.

Most important thing: The story behind the song will far outweigh any dance steps you perform together.

In fact, the guests won’t remember whether your footwork was perfect. They’ll remember the smile on her face and the tears in yours. Choose a song that means something, and the rest will fall into place.

2. Dance something that reduces stress

Here’s the deal: Dances that move at the pace of walking allow your brain to think and converse like you’re walking. Dances that move at the pace of sprinting limit the “casual functions” (talking, smiling, breathing) of the brain.

Our recommendations:

For most dads, the “Light and Casual” column is where you want to live. These dances give you room to breathe, smile, and actually enjoy the moment instead of counting frantically in your head. For more on this topic, check out Holiday Ball 2014: The Official Recap.

3. It’s OK to get Emotional, just keep things moving

We know this is a big deal moment. Growing up, you’ve been her rock, her shoulder to cry on, and you’ve provided great direction and advice. This dance is no different. As tough as it is, you’ve got to:

– Keep it moving – even if there’s a tear or two en route to your cheek

– Provide support – keeping your elbows stretched and your back straight will give her plenty of support if she’s beating you to the “cry party”

– Give direction – thank her for the dance with a hug and some words of praise and encouragement for this new chapter in her life

Here’s a secret: almost everyone in the room will be watching with misty eyes. You’re not performing brain surgery – you’re sharing a moment with your daughter. If you get choked up, that’s not a failure. That’s love.

Most important thing to remember: Whether it’s her new marriage or your new dance skills; everyone will be crying.

4. Stay in your lane

Your basketball coach always told you, “how you practice is how you play.” Well, the same holds true for your dance performance. Nothing will get you onto “America’s Funniest Home Videos” faster than if you attempt something in the performance that wasn’t practiced. So if you want to keep it classy, the best thing you can do to “Stay in your lane” is to take dance lessons at a (prepare for a big plug) professional, world-renowned dance organization. Somewhere like, say – I don’t know, Arthur Murray? Doing that will:

• Teach you how to dance for the day – and maybe forever
• Reduce the stress of anything dance related – or even wedding related
• Help develop a strategy that caters to your time schedule and ability – even if, up until that point, it seemed like a laughing matter
• Eliminate your daughter feeling obligated to be your teacher – she’s got her heart in the right place, but she has enough to think about

Trust me on that last point. Your daughter doesn’t need the added stress of teaching you the basics while planning a wedding. That’s what professionals are for.

5. Start Earlier Than You Think

Most dads wait until the last minute. Don’t be that dad. Starting your dance preparation 2-3 months before the wedding gives you time to actually learn, practice, and get comfortable – without cramming everything into a stressful final week.

And here’s a bonus: those dance skills you develop? They don’t disappear after the wedding. You’ll have them for every anniversary, every party, every opportunity to dance with your wife – which brings us to the final point.

What Happens After The Wedding?

Well, you’ve done it. You have helped your daughter successfully navigate through life to find the man of her dreams. By following these Father Daughter dance tips, you’ll be helping her navigate the dance floor as well. However, just because she’s starting a new life with her spouse doesn’t mean that you can’t do the same with yours. This new “Dad the dancer” persona is quite the popular dude – especially with that other lady in your life: “Mom the Spanish Seniorita.”

Safe to say, the lessons you learn for the wedding could be the beginning of something much bigger. Many fathers discover that they actually enjoy dancing – and their wives are thrilled to have a partner who finally knows what he’s doing.

Happy Dancing!

Some Great Father Daughter Dance songs:

“They can’t take that away from me” – Frank Sinatra

“More” – Frank Sinatra

“L-O-V-E” – Nat King Cole

“Brown Eyed Girl” – Van Morrison

“Edelweiss” – The Sound of Music Soundtrack

“What a Wonderful World” – Louis Armstrong

“My Girl” – The Temptations

“Unforgettable” – Nat King Cole

“The Way You Look Tonight” – Frank Sinatra