Embrace Discomfort
We needed coffee.
Actually, we needed time to wake up, drink coffee, do some light stretching, have a little conversation, and then, of course, start our dance practice.
And then that morning ritual came crashing down… and it was one of the best things that ever happened to us.
During the time that Daisey and I were still competing professionally, we learned many lessons about dancing, and being better dance partners together. But one lesson came in the form of a person, traveling around the world, and it tipped our universe upside-down.
Tonia Kosovich, our longtime dance coach, traveled from Australia to San Francisco to work with us leading up to a big competition. We had expected her to need some rest before we got our lessons started.
She had other plans. “Let’s get to the studio. We have work to do.”
While we were expecting a slow, recover-from-jet-lag buildup to full functionality, Tonia had been planning all the ways she was going to give us our competitive edge.
We arrived at the studio and we started our usual pre-practice routine – the coffee, the stretching, the conversation, more coffee. That is, until Tonia redirected us.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“Making coffee.” I answered.
“Not right now you’re not” she said. It was not a suggestion.
And that’s when her plans knocked over our plans like a kangaroo kick to the chest. I set the coffee down.
“I need you to get on the floor and show me your five dances. Full out, non-stop, full speed. No excuses.”
She looked on as we labored through our Cha-Cha, Rumba, Swing, Bolero and Mambo routines. We were in a state of shock. It wasn’t just the 0 to 100 in physical effort, but the upending of our usual warm up to dance functionality that really had us reeling.
Looking back, it was the probably the least comfortable start to a practice we had ever experienced. Coincidentally, it was one of the most pivotal moments in our training.
Looking back, Tonia taught us so much more than what we covered on the dance floor during our lessons that day. Here are a few takeaways that I believe could help anyone with their dance hobby.
1. Embrace Discomfort
It’s easy to convince ourselves that prolonging something uncomfortable will somehow make it more tolerable. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Our slow start to our practices didn’t make the 100%, full out, challenge feel any easier. If anything, it set the bar low enough that we wouldn’t reach that 100% level until the tail end of a practice.
Tonia’s method of having us dance our full array of competitive dances, full out, right from the beginning was a masterclass in embracing discomfort. The sooner you get it out of the way, the sooner you can learn and grow from it.
2. Evaluate – Even If You’re Good
Success can be the enemy of success.
What Tonia Kosovich taught us that day went far beyond dancing.
In doing so, she helped us create a practice scenario that was fraught with challenges. All of our bodily systems were on alert.
It was the dance equivalent of a fire drill, and the result was something that propelled us in both our competition and teaching careers.
We ran into a problem many people experience every day. We had found the path of least resistance� and enjoyed the ease of that journey.
Fortunately, there was a voice in our lives that was willing to push us back on the right track. To seek out the challenge hidden on the other side of our plateau.
As an Arthur Murray student, you�ve faced challenges that few people ever will. From walking through the door to your first lesson, to trying out that dance you were convinced you could never learn – you�ve overcome so much. But now is not the time to settle for the easy path.
Whether it�s with an upcoming event, or a new level in your program, it�s time to embrace the discomfort. It�s where all the growth takes place. Gianni Rometty once said �Growth and comfort do not coexist� and I couldn�t agree more.
So take that next step toward the scary thing.
And if you�re still uncertain, don�t worry. Tonia will be arriving in September.
