The 3 Ways You Make Progress in Dancing or Anything Else
There are plenty of times when you’re convinced you are making zero progress.
Like you’re stuck in a progress black hole, sucking in all the potential gains past the sucky event horizon, vaporizing them, and any other progress toting people that happen to get in the way.
The progress black hole overtakes both students and teachers, social and competitive, ballroom, latin, jazz, tap, and ballet dancers alike.
It swallows up everything from good days to entire dance hobbies, and before you allow this swirling vortex to take hold of everything dance related that you hold near and dear, let us present a solution.
Yes, and it’s “progress black hole” proof.
3 Ways You Make Progress in Dancing (or Anything Else)
The Progress Black Hole (“PBH”) is powered by emotions, knee-jerk reactions, and snap decisions all taking place in the moment. It’s easy to fall into… especially if momentum starts to falter with your lessons. Whether it’s changes at work, home, or your Salsa repertoire, every dancer will experience challenges. But just like anything else on, or off, the dance floor – it’s all about how we handle the challenges that will determine if the setbacks become the setups for something greater.
Hopefully, this article can lend some perspective and can give you some clarity if you’re in the midst of one of those “PBH” moments.
Progress Zone 1: How it Looks
There are times where you will outperform your opinions. It’s crazy, but true. Think of athletes that play an incredible game, even after devastating news or an illness. Whether it’s Michael Jordan’s flu game or Kerri Strug’s vault in the 1996 Olympics – neither athlete was at 100% but you’d never guess that by how they performed.
You don’t need to be the greatest basketball player or an Olympic gymnast to accomplish this either.
As a dancer, your brain can be the biggest villain in your progress story. Overthinking and second guessing every step of the way, it can present a relenting, and sometimes convincing, argument.
Here’s the good news: It’s hard to see what you look like when you’re performing… but others can.
The opinions of those watching you may be seeing you for the first time or have seen you consistently from the beginning. While your brain may be keeping a record of every misstep, those watching aren’t.
Solution: If you get a compliment in Zone 1, accept it with grace and appreciation. The audience is responding to how you looked. Period, end of story. Positive feedback from another student, friend, teacher, or dance coach is a sign that things are going right… no matter what your brain may say otherwise.
Progress Zone 2: How it Feels to Your Partner
One unique aspect of ballroom and latin dancing is that there’s, well, a partner. In some cases, that partner is your teacher, in others it’s your significant other, another student, or someone you’re meeting on the social dance floor.
Prior to my start at Arthur Murray, I would frequent any nightclub that offered swing dancing. I’ll never forget the first time hearing “you’re a really good lead”. It made my night. I had no idea why she said that, I didn’t have the guts to investigate the evidence of her assessment, but I thanked her and felt like a video game character with a bonus life for the remainder of the evening.
It’s important to keep in mind the vantage point of anyone you are dancing with. If you’re a leader, the follower can feel your frame, the timing, your technique, body action, you name it. Just like being a passenger in an Uber, you can tell which drivers are confident when merging on the freeway. A follower can feel that from the leader when it’s there, and also when it’s not.
If you’re a follower, the leader can immediately feel if you’ve got good fundamentals, nice balance, footwork, and how responsive you are to their signals.
Now, let’s get one thing cleared up right away before we go any further: It’s rare that a casual, amateur dance partner will give you the dance equivalent of a full body scan the next time you dance at a party. They may just say, “that was fun” or “let’s do that again”.
A word of caution. That same amateur may have areas that they are working on in their own dancing. In general, we want to save any critiques or questions for a professional to fix. Nothing will take the fun out of dancing faster than feeling like a dance partner is secretly working as a dance critic doling out unsolicited feedback.
Solution: Zone 2 is a great way to get positive feedback on areas of your execution you may not even be aware of. If you receive a compliment here, accept it, don’t question it or demand hard evidence. If you’re not sure, a good rule of thumb is to share that feedback with your teacher so they can add context. Avoid critiquing social dance partners. You can thank them for the dance and change partners. The thing that may have registered on your dance radar is probably something that’s a work in progress.
Progress Zone 3: How it Feels to You
This may be the most elusive form of progress. If we consider all three zones, this area only counts as 33% of the score yet we seem to give it 100% of our attention. When you do achieve that moment of progress that makes you feel wonderful, hold on tight to it. That’s a breakthrough. It may not happen as regularly as you’d like, but you’re also developing new habits that will go from awkward to natural. Any breakthrough in Zone 3 is worthy of a high five, a hug, or your own little happy dance.
After all, there’s an alternate reality where you abandoned the learning process, or never even started it at all. But you’ve stuck it out, persisted when it wasn’t easy, all to reveal the beautiful skill, step, or new dance that was on the other side of your comfort zone just waiting for you.
When in doubt, remember the Stonecutter’s Credo by Jacob Riis:
“When nothing seems to help, I go look at a stonecutter hammering away at his rock, perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it. Yet at the hundred and first blow it will split in two, and I know it was not that blow that did it, but all that had gone before.”
Solution: Celebrate Zone 3 progress. Dance breakthroughs don’t occur without some dance challenges. Soak up these moments. Every turning point is moving you closer to the natural use phase of your dance journey.
Understanding These Progress Points
An Independent Trio
The reason these are so effective is that they are all independent of each other. This means that you could be making progress, even if:
- It feels good to you, but doesn’t look so great when you watch it on video
- Feels great to your partner, but doesn’t feel so great to you
- Looks great to others but felt lousy on the inside
The Miraculous (and Elusive) Moment
There will be a time when the heavens will open up, the dance frames will align, and there will be gold stars of progress in all three categories. Zones 1, 2, and 3 will come together and it will be a moment to log in your dance journal and cherish. It can, and will, happen, but it’s infrequent, elusive, but a feeling worth aiming for with each and every dance attempt you make.
The Common Tendency To Watch Out For
There will be times when your teacher pays you a compliment and you won’t feel you deserve it. You may wonder if your teacher is giving you false praise or are given strict orders to compliment every student like it’s a recipe or spell from Harry Potter. The reality is that whether they are dancing with you, or observing you with your partner, they can spot progress that is truly difficult to detect. Your brain is what makes progress difficult to see, even if your body has done the work to deserve it.
Don’t dismiss it. Understand that they are assessing many more data points, from a professional vantage point, and false praise only tarnishes their own professional reputation. Growth is hard to assess on your own and your teachers have had front row seats to your Arthur Murray dance story so far. They are fully equipped to help you pinpoint the progress you’re making.
Final Thought
Progress is not as elusive as you might think. Here are some quick takeaways:
- Remember to respect the ratio – Your opinion may be important, but it’s not the end all 100% of your progress story.
- Be someone’s Zone 2 highlight – You can be a dance progress detective. Give someone you dance with a compliment on something really specific that you appreciated about the dance you shared with them.
- Consider the source – If you experience an unsolicited dance critique, always consider the source. If it’s your teacher, they’ll provide context, add layers, and guide you through the process. If it’s just a casual amateur outside of Arthur Murray, or your brother in law who loves Dancing with the Stars, smile and then share it with your teacher later.
- Go easy on yourself – You’re taking on a rewarding hobby that can have it’s share of challenges. Be kind to yourself as you and your teachers help navigate through the Curve of Learning.
- Healthy Perspective – There were dance problems that you used to have that are so natural now, it’s almost embarrassing to admit they were ever an issue. If you’re facing something now that feels daunting, there’s a future version of you that is encouraging you to keep going… because the breakthrough is right around the corner.
We can all fall into the PBH of “if you’re not first, you’re last” or “you’re either winning or losing.” That is binary thinking and it’s a threat to anything you’re attempting to get better at.
After all, an assembly line is a process that can only proceed with progress.
Every seasoned driver was once a petrified new driver at some point.
Every new dancer can look better, feel better, or believe they are better even if there’s still more of the process ahead of them.
One of the best parts of your dance hobby is that if you allow the process to take place, things will never be boring. You’re taking on incremental challenges on every lesson, and you are – in every sense of the word – a work in progress.
Happy Dancing.
